


Whatever It Takes

by untapdtreasure



Category: Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-01
Updated: 2014-04-22
Packaged: 2017-11-04 15:22:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 19,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/395319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/untapdtreasure/pseuds/untapdtreasure
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>His hard exterior kept everyone at a distance for the most part. No one bothered to get close enough to look passed the explosive anger he often wore in his eyes as a shield to keep anyone that dared take a second glance from taking a third.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Carol lay with her back to her tent door. She couldn't close her eyes for fear of what she would see. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw Daryl's bloodied knuckles. And how he had avoided her eyes after she asked what he had done.

 

He had done what he had to do for the good of the group. She knew that, but it made her ache inside that he'd had to do it in the first place. That he'd been asked to do it because of his past behavior. He wasn't that man anymore. Why couldn't they all see it?

 

When they'd first met in camp, she thought he was like Ed. He had a temper, but he only used violence when his back was to the wall. Ed used it whenever he needed to feel big, whenever she needed put in her place. And that was often enough that she tried to avoid it best she could.

 

She sat up quickly, shaking her head. No. No. No. Daryl wasn't anything like Ed. She had stared into his eyes enough the last few weeks to know that there was so much more just beneath his surface.

 

Daryl's eyes told the story of a life of violence. As well as the scars on his back. The scars he hadn't wanted her to see as he pulled the sheet up to cover himself that night after he'd been out looking for Sophia and took an arrow to the side and Andrea's shot grazed his temple.

 

He'd flinched when she'd gone to kiss him that night. He flinched anytime they'd touched; whether it was planned or accidental. She knew that fear. She understood it. She watched him as he avoided human contact as much as possible in their camp. Touching was almost impossible, but yet, he made it look easy. His hard exterior kept everyone at a distance for the most part. No one bothered to get close enough to look passed the explosive anger he often wore in his eyes as a shield to keep anyone that dared take a second glance from taking a third.

 

That day that everything went down at the barn was the exception. When Sophia emerged from the barn and began to stumble blindly toward what she knew to be food, his arm had gone out to catch her. His weapon had been forgotten in the Georgia dust as he clung to her. As he protected her in the only way he could.

 

She remembered how strong his arms were as he held her against his chest. He was the only one to even try. She hadn't forgot that. She never would. So long as she lived, she never, never would.

 

She turned onto her back to stare at the tent roof. The look in his eyes swam in front of her eyes before shifting to his knuckles. His bloodied and cut up knuckles.

 

She felt the bile rise up in her throat. She pushed herself over onto her side then onto all fours. She then pushed herself up and undid the tent zipper hurriedly. She felt the cold night air biting at her face as she moved blindly to the edge of the camp with no thought of running into a Walker.

 

She hit her knees as she dry heaved into the long-stemmed grass and underbrush. She barely heard the approaching footsteps. She put her hand up, not even knowing which of them that it was. “I’m okay,” she reassured them, glancing over as the figure crouched down. She’d recognize his boots anywhere. Her face flushed, and she kept her eyes lowered. She was humiliated that he’d seen her this way.

 

“Here.” He held out a handkerchief for her to wipe her mouth with. When she took it, he touched her forehead hesitantly. “No fever.”

 

She wiped her mouth and whispered, “No. I was just thinking…” She tried to get a good look at his knuckles as she took the handkerchief from him, but it was just too dark out. She shrugged and spoke with more certainty that she felt, “I’m fine. I swear.”

 

“Can you walk?” he asked gruffly, pulling at her elbow as he helped her stand. His grip was rougher than he intended.

 

She pulled away once she was steady on her feet. She looked down. She was in her sock feet. She’d forgotten her shoes in her haste to get somewhere to throw up without it being inside her tent or right outside it. “Yeah…” Her teeth chattered.

 

“’Get your ass back inside before you catch your death, woman.” He started making his way to his own camp. He could see from here that his fire was dying.

 

She rushed after him. “Hey, Daryl. Please wait…” Her feet were being tugged and torn through her socks from the rocks and brush as she waded through it to get to him.

 

He turned, snorting, “Woman, don’t you need to be getting your beauty rest?”

 

She laughed then. Not a long laugh or a full-bellied laugh, but a relaxed laugh. “I’d have to sleep for an eternity for that.”

 

He frowned, fidgeting on his feet. “Look. I’m ‘bout to turn in and get some shut eye. Fuck, woman. It’s not safe out here at night. Haven’t you learned anything yet?” He hitched his crossbow onto his back and looked around as a twig snapped. He instantly reached out and pulled her closer. His tent was closer. “C’mon.” He couldn't take any chances.

 

She let him push her toward his camp. “Your fire’s about out,” she stated softly as she reached for a log to toss onto it. When he put his hand over her arm to stop her, she looked up. “You’ll freeze.”

 

“Hell, Carol. I've been through worse,” he said as he moved around his camp, making sure it was secure. He glanced at her from across the campsite. This was the first time he’d spoken her name out loud. No doubt the same thought wasn't crossing her mind.

 

She relaxed visibly at his use of her name. She sat down on a log close to the fire and discretely tried to push her damp socks toward the still hot embers to dry them. She tucked her hands into her cardigan and tried to warm her fingers. She was about to speak when she heard him snort and push his tent door flap open.

 

He didn’t speak as he thrust his jacket at her. “You’d think you’d have more sense than to come out half dressed…”

 

She stood up, pushing the jacket back toward his chest. “It’s not like I planned to be out of my tent throwing up at his ungodly hour, so save it, Daryl Dixon.” She stamped her foot and hissed, “And another thing. I didn’t ask you to be my white night so…so…” She was upset with him for that afternoon that she just wanted to pick a fight about anything else to keep from discussing it.

 

“Tell me how you really feel, woman.” He tossed the jacket back into his still open tent and snorted when she didn’t start to talk again. “S’matter? Cat got your tongue?” He advanced on her, looming over her. He gestured wildly in her direction.

 

She flinched and took a step back, eyes wide. She’d been on the other end of anger for so long that her instincts told her to cool it. She stood rooted to that spot now as he took another step forward.

 

“Run on back to your camp. Climb into your nice warm tent and just leave me the hell be!” he growled at her through clenched teeth.


	2. Chapter 2

"No," she spoke softly. Her eyes had softened as her hand moved up. She laid her palm against his chest. She could feel his wildly beating heart beneath the thin material of his shirt. She met his eyes.

 

It was Daryl that took a step back this time. His eyes wild at having her actually make physical contact with him. He realized that he'd been slow in reacting and that terrified him. He snorted and began to pace in front of her. His hands balling and unballing into fists. "Just leave me be!" he repeated, louder with a sneer. "I don't want you here. Don't you get it? Or are you just a stupid bitch?"

 

Carol tried so hard to keep the hurt from her eyes as his words reached her ears then her heart. She finally looked down. The cold no longer bothering her. She nodded and stepped around him to make her way back to the main camp. She knew her place.

 

He beat his fists against his outer thighs and growled, "Carol, wait." He watched her shake her head and continue putting distance between them. He moved after her, touching her elbow gently then grasping it to stop her. "Are you deaf? I said wait..." he snarled.

 

She jerked herself free. Before she knew what overcome her, she had raised her hand and slapped him across the face. "Don't you ever grab me again!" Her hand then instantly went to her own mouth. Shock radiated from her eyes. In all her years with Ed, she had never once stood up to him.

 

He put his hands up, but he remained in the same spot. The distance between them was less than half a foot. "Deserved that," he spoke gruffly but with not quite as much edge to his voice. "Woman, you...you ain't gonna come here and try to shrink my head."

 

"I wasn't..." she started.

 

He shook his head. "I ain't done. You said what you came to say. Floor's mine." He kept balling and unballing his fists as he dropped them to his side. "This ain't easy for me. This...this talking and being with people. Sets my teeth on edge the way everyone's always in my face..."

 

She took a step back then but he only stepped closer. She sighed in frustration, crossing her arms across her chest. "What is it that you want?"

 

"Don't know, but it ain't easy for me. Just...just slow down." He tilted his head a little, eyes growing narrow as he tried to read her. He raised his hand and gently touched her arm. "Did I hurt you?" When she shook her head, he let his fingertips rest against her cold skin. "Sit by the fire? I'll put 'nother log on."

 

She looked back toward the main camp, then back to his smaller one. She had never felt completely at home with the others, but when he'd been close by, she felt safe. She knew he'd protect them. Protect her. Now she was terrified of him being so far away. She whispered, "Okay."

 

He relaxed a little, dropping his hand to his side. He waited for her to start the trek back to his dwindling fire and followed behind her. He was quiet as she settled back onto the log beside the burning embers. He reached inside his tent, drawing out the relatively clean blanket that covered his bed. He shook it out and placed it around her shoulders gently.

 

She moved her hand up to cover his as it gently lingered at her shoulder. She looked up at him and whispered, "Thanks..." She wasn't surprised at how fast he'd pulled away, but she was surprised that it wasn't followed by some smart ass retort.

 

His muscles rippled as he reached down and pulled up a log and placed it onto the fire. He squatted down to poke at it with a longer stick. He then glanced at her through the flame. She wasn't a typically beautiful woman with long blonde hair or flowing legs, but he found her attractive. Her beauty radiated from deep within her soul, and it shined through in moments when she wasn't trying to hide it from those around her. "You warm 'nough?"

 

She gave him a soft smile and then nodded. "Yeah. Thanks. It's quiet here..." she said softly as her eyes moved around his camp. It felt like home to her, but she quickly pushed the thought away. "I can actually hear myself think."

 

He poked and prodded at the wood as she spoke. He liked his solitude, but somehow having her near felt good too. He looked up again. "Yeah..." He noticed how her eyes were now watching the flame as it licked higher and higher. He could see the lone tear as it slipped down her cheek. "S'not always a good thang," he added just soft enough for her to hear.

 

She nodded slowly then lowered her head again to look at her clasped hands as they now lay in her lap. "Sophia hadn't ever been camping before...before all this. Hell, neither had I." She swallowed the lump forming in her throat. "She...she always loved the outdoors though. The park..." She smiled then at the memory. "We went there as often as we could. It was the only place..." Her voice cracked, and she had to look away and bit her cheek to keep from choking out a sob.

 

She had learned to control her crying over the years. It only made Ed's anger worse, and if he was drunk, he'd only beat her again if her heard her. She avoided his eyes even as he shifted so that he was directly in front of her. She shook her head. "I'm sorry. I don't know why..."

 

He moved to sit next to her. "You miss your little girl. If it helps...talk," he said as he gestured for her to continue to do so. He glanced at her before focusing back on the fire as it crackled and snapped with heat and life.

 

She felt the heat radiate from his body as their legs touched. She licked her lips and laid her head on her own shoulder and watched him. She whispered, "Okay." But she didn't want to risk crying now. He was letting her in, and she wouldn't screw this up. She saw his knuckles now in the firelight. She sighed softly and before she could think about it, she reached out to take his hand and run her fingers ever so gently along his scabbed knuckles. "Does it hurt?"

 

His first instinct was to pull away and to rant at her about touching him, but he kept his hand where it lay and let her touch soothe him. "Not 'nough to complain about." He looked over at her, and their eyes locked. His mouth twitched as he tried to figure out what was going on in her head. "Hell, we'd better get some sleep."

 

He pushed himself up and then looked down at her. "You can take the tent. Just let me grab the other sleeping bag."

 

She stood then, losing her balance a little from having thrown up everything she'd eaten that night which hadn't been much to begin with. She felt his hand at her waist, steadying her. Her head spun, but not from hunger. It was from the heat of his gentle hand at her waist. "That's just silly. It's big enough for us both..."


	3. Chapter 3

Daryl studied her in his own quiet way and nodded. He let his hand fall from her waist and reached for the blanket. "Sleep on this side so you'll stay warm." He gestured to the side closest to the fire. He noticed that she wasn't moving and he started to reach out and touch her cheek to get her attention, but he let his fingers flex then fall back to his side. "What's wrong?"

She shook herself gently then gave his arm a reassuring soft squeeze before slipping into the tent quickly. She moved to the side he had suggested and curled herself into a ball. She was facing him, watching him in the eerily moonlit darkness. She didn't realize she was holding her breath.

He slipped into the tent quickly, quietly. He sat down, unlacing his boots and slipping them off. He kept them within reach and laid back on his back to stare at the tent roof. He could feel her staring at him and glanced her way. "You got something to say, spit it out." His voice wasn't quite as gruff as he had hoped it would be.

She finally breathed out a soft, "Good night, Daryl." She made herself close her eyes and settle into the covers and the pillow that smelled of him. It invaded her senses, and she knew it would be damn near impossible to sleep that night. He aroused and awakened parts of her she'd long since thought dead. She tried to shift quietly so as not to disturb him.

He kept his eyes on her in the darkness. He often had a hard time sleeping in strange places. He fought with himself on whether to try and ease her mind or just keep on feigning sleep.

When she grew quieter, his choice was made for him. He finally heard her breathing even out, indicating that she was indeed asleep. He noticed that the sleeping bag had shifted, uncovering her torso. He reached over gently and covered her. He laid his hand gently on what he knew to be her arm.

They had more in common than any of the others in camp. She had an abusive marriage, and he'd grown up being abused by first his father and then his older brother. Merle was a bit older than him, and he'd been around to catch their Daddy's temper on more than one occasion. After the son of a bitch had died, Merle had shown him the only thing their Daddy ever left them; physical and verbal abuse.

He shuddered and withdrew his hand like she'd burned him. He laid back down, muttering curses and insults directed at her for his slip up. He had his fists clenched at his sides, berating the woman for actions she wasn't even aware that he'd committed. He glanced at her and let out a ragged breath. "Son of a bitch..." he muttered in a low growl.

She shifted in her sleep as the beginnings of a nightmare plagued her much needed slumber. She was losing her daughter all over again. She clawed at the sleeping bag, kicking and squirming. "Please," she whispered with tears on her cheeks. "Not my baby. Please?"


	4. Chapter 4

He let out a frustrated sigh. He didn't know how to take care of people. He did good to take care of himself after all this started, but she looked to him to protect her. Hell, what did she expect? Really? He hadn't ever been up for relationships other than the ones his own birth had given him. His family was about all he knew how to handle, and even then, he did a piss poor job of it.

Carol's body writhed in an unseen agony. "Please?!" she shrieked, sitting bolt up right. Her breath came in quivering gasps, and for a moment, she didn't know where she was. "Oh God! Sophia?!" she screamed.

Daryl's touch to her shoulder was tender enough that she hadn't shied away from him. She turned, meeting his eyes, and he knew that she didn't have to be told that her daughter was gone. That her precious little girl was dead. "Need a drink?" He grabbed for a bottle of whiskey that he had stashed away from the rest of the camp. He unscrewed the lid and passed it to her after wiping the mouth of the bottle on his sleeve.

She took it with shaking fingers. She wasn't a drinker, but she took the bottle anyway and put it to her lips before the smell could turn her stomach sour and she'd refuse. She turned the bottle up, taking two large gulps before lowering it and sputtering with coughs as the amber liquid burned her tongue and throat and settled hot in her stomach.

He rubbed her back as gently as he could. "Easy..." he said softly. He was closer to her now that he'd allowed himself to get since the day she'd refused to go to Sophia's funeral. He met her eyes in the darkness as he saw the dampness still on her cheeks. He whispered, "I can't imagine what you're going through."

"But can't you?" she whispered. "You lost her too. After everything..."

"I was too late, Carol. I couldn't..." He shook his head, refusing to do this with her now. He wouldn't talk about this. Not ever. He grabbed his boots. "I need some air," he growled as he pushed open the tent flap and stalked from the tent in his sock feet.

She wouldn't push him. Not on this. This was something they would do together when they were both ready. And this just wasn't the time. She laid back against the sleeping bag, which was damp from her nightmare. She could feel the liquor twisting and turning in her gut but she refused to give in and purge it from her. She closed her eyes and rolled onto her side where her quiet sobs shook her body.

He had shoved his feet into his boots and laced them up. He paced the far side of the fire and glanced at the tent from time to time as he let his emotions and his anger well inside him. He then picked up his crossbow and slung it over his shoulder. He couldn't sleep, and he'd be damned if he let her try and shrink his head anymore. He stalked off into the woods to do the only thing he was sure he knew how. And that was to hunt and to provide.


	5. Chapter 5

He'd already bagged four squirrels and a rabbit before the sun flitted through the trees. His throat was dry and raw from climbing up to get his kills, and he knew he should head back, but something kept him from turning around. He wasn't ready to face Carol. Not when he knew he had left her hurting. He had heard her crying and knew that she had desperately tried to hide it, but he hadn't known how to comfort her. And that made him very ashamed.

Hunger won out in the end. And thirst. He followed the same trail on the way back and when he emerged, he saw her sitting at his fire, alone. He slowly approached the dwindling embers and his tent mate. "Hey..."

She looked up, rubbing her knees through her jeans and gave him a half smile. "Hey. Need me to take those?" She stood up, offering to clean the kills.

"I got it." His voice was softer than normal. He figured he'd done enough damage; the least he could do was be civil. "You'd better let them know you're a'right. They'll be tearing the camp down looking for you." He studied her as she looked from the fire to the other camp.

"Yeah." She grabbed her shoes and slipped them on. "See ya." She trudged across the field toward the farmhouse. She'd been a fool to think he'd actually talk to her after last night. She felt hot tears stinging her eyes. Angry with herself, she wiped them away and squared her shoulders. Today would just be another day to get through before the next day dawned, and she had to do it all over again.

She could feel his eyes on her back, and she had to resist the urge to turn and ask him what he was staring at. Didn't he know she didn't want his pity? She hated how much she'd been throwing herself into his path as of late. It had to stop. He wasn't ever going to open up to her.

Daryl stood there watching her grow smaller and smaller as she put more and more distance between them. He ached to call out to her, invite her back, and spill himself at her feet. How he had let her down. How he had let Sophia down. How he'd broken all his promises to her and to himself when she'd been dead all along. He shook his head and growled, "I didn't ask her to give a damn. She knew what she was getting into..."

Dale hadn't been able to sleep after being relieved from duty by Shane around four a.m. So he'd taken to walking the grounds, shotgun on his shoulder. He had seen Carol sitting at Daryl's fire, knowing full well that she'd slept over at his camp that night. He'd watched the little scene when Daryl had emerged from the woods with his kills. He moved closer, and he had heard what Daryl had muttered out loud thinking he was alone. "Son, you really need to stop being so hard on her and on yourself..."

Daryl, knife in hand, turned toward the sound of his voice. "Who asked you, old man?" He straddled the log and began to work on skinning and gutting the rabbit. He looked up at him. His eyes were as dangerous as the knife in his hand.

Dale put up one hand. "No one asks me anything, but I'm going to tell you what I think anyway." That's just how he handled things. He saw something going wrong in camp, he spoke his mind. "Carol cares about you. Sometimes, I wonder why, but she sees something in you that the rest of us are starting to. You... Daryl, she didn't choose to care about you. She can't help it."

Daryl stabbed the tree bark and stood up. "Well, she better learn. I ain't got time for women and their bullshit games. I'm better off alone, and the sooner she gets that through her head, the better for both of us."

Dale sighed softly. "I saw the way you held her...the day with Sophia," he choked up slightly. That horrific nightmare still haunted his days and nights. He approached him, touching his shoulder gently. "You may tell yourself you don't care about her, but you do."

"Well, who the fuck asked you?" Daryl shrugged him off and stormed into his tent. "Now could you just leave me be?" He dropped to his knees, hands bloody from the rabbit and wiped them on an old, already dirty shirt. His head was spinning. He did care about Carol. He hated himself for not knowing how to comfort her, for not knowing how to be there for her. She always tried so hard and here he was with the inability to even try to learn.

Dale stood looking at the mouth of the tent and finally just sighed and shook his head before leaving to head back to the main camp. He saw Carol preparing breakfast and starting the routine of their camp life. He approached her slowly, cautiously. "He's scared, you know?"

Startled, she nearly dropped the skillet she was holding. "Excuse me?" She looked up, seeing Dale. She'd liked him from the start. Sophia had, too. She tried to fight off the feeling of foreboding as she saw his eyes. She really didn't want to discuss Daryl with anyone. Least of all him. He saw too much of everyone in camp even when they tried desperately to hide themselves from him. He had natural intuition, and it unnerved her how he seemed to get right to the heart of the matter no matter what the situation.

"Daryl. He's more of a frightened little boy than that hard ass he tries to hide behind." He sat on one of the lawn chairs and watched her.

She let the silence fill the air as she tumbled his words over and over in her head. Finally, she looked up meeting his eyes. "I know," she sighed. "I'm just...too tired to deal with it anymore. I've tried, and he's never going to let me in."

Dale leaned forward, one hand gripping the stalk of the shotgun. "Just be patient with him."

"How much more patient do I have to be? He thinks I don't know how much he's hurting over my baby girl, but I do..." Tears welled in her eyes and spilled down her cheeks. "I see it every time I look at him, but he won't talk to me. That's all...all I need. It's all I want."

Dale stood then, placing his hand on Carol's arm. "Come here." He opened his arms to her and when she slipped easily into them, he wrapped them tight around her, placing a kiss to her head. "If you give up on him, then all he's known all his life is just going to be that much more real and true to him. He's never had anyone as good as you fighting for him."


	6. Chapter 6

Carol let Dale’s words tumble over and over around in her head the rest of the day. She wasn’t stupid. Daryl was purposely avoiding her, and she let him. It never did well to corner a scared animal. And wasn’t that what he was?

When Rick called them all into the farmhouse to discuss Randall’s fate, she’d given her opinion, and then Dale had ripped into her for it. And she felt the sting of his words, and the only person she wanted to talk to was Daryl. She tried to meet his eyes, but he refused.

When she followed him onto the porch. "Daryl, wait..."

He turned half-way down the steps and glared at her. "What do you want?" He could see the pain in her eyes, and he regretted his tone. He regretted how he was treating her all the way around.

"Forget it," she said, pushing passed him down the steps, purposely brushing against him. "Go bury your head in the sand while the whole group falls apart around you." What did she care if he did? What was she to him anyway? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. But possibly a burden.

He narrowed his eyes and let her put a bit of distance between them before he managed to get his legs and head to work together for a change. He strode quickly after her, catching her about the elbow. His grasp was gentle this time. "Carol, please..."

She closed her eyes and shook her head. "I don't want to lay all this on you." She chewed her lip then. Out of all of them, he'd been the only one to listen to her and not judge her. Aside from Dale, but that was just Dale's personality. He listened to everybody. Daryl hadn't ever had to, but he'd been there for her. He'd been quiet and listened.

"You stop trusting me or somethin'?" he asked softly. "Because I didn't bring your girl home?" His voice was almost childlike as he looked down at the dirt at his feet. He gently scuffed the toe of his boot over it and kicked up a small dust cloud. "All I ever wanted was to put that lil girl right back in your arms. All I ever wanted. And I failed her. I failed you..." He looked up then and his blue eyes swam with unshed tears.

Carol's eyes welled with tears that spilled over and ran down her cheeks like little rivers. She turned slowly, releasing the grip he still had on her elbow. "You never failed me or Sophia. You were the only one of all of them to go out day and after and try. That's not failure..."

"Still didn't bring her home," Daryl insisted. He gestured toward the barn where she'd been kept the whole time they were camped just a couple hundred yards away. His hand fell helpless to his side as he gripped the crossbow handle even tighter in his other hand.

"She's not suffering anymore..." Carol whispered. "And for that, I'm more grateful to you and Shane and Rick than you know." She closed her eyes, and she saw in slow-motion how Rick had raised his weapon and fired the shot that had put the empty shell of her daughter down. She shuddered visibly.

Seeing the shudder that wracked her body was all it took to step forward and take her in his arms. He didn't have the words to speak to comfort her. And he didn't have to when she moved both her hands around him and up his back to fist his shirt. She sobbed quietly into his chest, not caring who saw them.


	7. Chapter 7

Daryl waited for her sobs to quiet. He'd stand there holding her all afternoon if that's what it took for her to feel better. He rested his cheek against her head and whispered, "You just let it all go, okay? You just let it all out. I've got you." He didn't notice when a few tears fell down his own face to get lost in her hair.

She felt them, hot and wet and real. She almost froze when she realized just what they were. Her own tears subsided. Her own fears were being quieted by a man who'd never known what that felt like. She slowly lifted her tear-stained face to look up at him. "Oh, Daryl..." she whispered.

He shook his head then. He didn't want her to worry about him. He didn't need her to. "Don't pity me." His request came out childlike again. He could feel himself starting to break apart. It was okay for Carol to see him fall apart. He trusted her like he'd never trusted anyone. That was the problem. He'd never had anyone go to bat for him, and to show him just what he was worth. And he'd rejected her time and time again, but here she was. He felt eyes on the pair of them. He couldn't let them see him weak. He refused to. "Let's take a walk. I know a place..."

He had discovered it earlier that week when he'd needed to be completely alone without eyes on his back. Where he'd let himself just be and not feel judged or pitied. He gripped the crossbow tighter in his hand and then pulled away from her.

She watched as he pulled away. If he was inviting her to this place to be nice, and not because he truly wanted her there, he'd resent her in the end. She cleared her throat and asked quietly, "Are you sure?"

He merely nodded and gestured for her to follow him. Before he knew what possessed him to do so, he offered her his free hand to take. When she reached out and firmly grasped his hand, he began to pull her along. He glanced back from time to time. "So you do trust me?"

"With my life." It wasn't anything she had to think about it. Daryl Dixon had earned his place in her heart and life, and that's where he would stay until they put her in the ground. She felt his grip on her hand loosen then, and he shifted his fingers until they tangled with hers.

He knew she'd be scared the minute they stepped over the treeline, so he turned slowly and stopped them. "We're going in here. Not far, but just a ways... I won't let anything happen to you," he promised softly.

Her free hand came up then, touching the bit of his chest where the shirt was open. She could see that long scar that she'd seen that night when he'd almost died looking for Sophia. She traced it gently. "I know," she spoke softly. Her eyes shifted up to his as she tilted her head. "I never worry when I'm with you."


	8. Chapter 8

He gently covered her hand and whispered, "Let's get a move on then..." He stepped away from her and quietly picked out their path. Silence fell between them. For that, he was grateful.

He glanced back at Carol after they'd been in the woods for about ten minutes. She was quieter than a mouse. He almost forgot he wasn't alone. He looked around them, picking up the trail again. "Just a bit further," he promised.

She looked up then and gave him a nod. She didn't care how far they had to go. This was better than sitting at camp and cross-stitching that was for damn sure.

She was looking down again, matching her steps with his carefully when she ran straight into his back. "What the..." She lifted her head to see what had caused him to stop and his fingers touched her lips to silence her.

He gently pulled her in front of him and used her shoulder to lay his arm over and point. He whispered, "Over there. Just right through the trees. See that?" He'd spotted the deer and her little fawn, and he knew that Carol would like it. He hesistated only a moment as he thought of her and her little girl. He swallowed hard as he waited for her reaction. When she was silent, he thought he'd done a bad thing in pointing out the beautiful sight before them. "Carol, I..."

Her right hand reached back and grabbed his wrist. She squeezed it gently and put her hand to her mouth. She was mesmerized. She wanted him to be quiet because she didn't want to ruin that moment. He seemed to know what she needed and he just stood there with her and watched.

Like the doe had sensed their presence, her ears pricked around and then she lifted her head in their direction. She seemed to stare right through them. Her body was frozen but not in fear. She then gently nudged her fawn with her nose and off into the trees they disappeared.

Neither of them moved, but Carol whispered, "She was looking right at us." When Daryl pulled from her grasp, he laid his hand on her hip and gave it a squeeze in agreement. She leaned back into him and turned her head. "Thank you." She moved to kiss his cheek.

Daryl's head turned at the same moment and their lips met. Hers were pursed in a kiss and his were slightly parted as he was about to speak. He froze but didn't pull away from her. Her lips were soft, and he hadn't ever wanted to feel anything like he wanted to feel that again. He remembered when she'd kissed his head and his skin prickled.

Carol's eyes flew open wide, but then she relaxed when she saw that he wasn't pulling away from her. She whispered, "Sor-." Her words were cut off when he pressed his lips to hers this time. She kissed him back. It wasn't a deep kiss that involved tongue or anything, but it was the most intimate kiss she'd experienced in a long, long time. Her body turned into his slowly.

His arm was around her waist now, holding her close to him. He looked down at her. "I, uh, yeah..." He gave that half smile and chewed his lip. "The creek's just...just there." He felt stupid then because she could see it with her own eyes. It was where the goddamn deer had been drinking. He gave her a soft squeeze and then he stepped away.

Carol's heart was thundering in her chest. She felt the heat flood her body and she was certain she'd been daydreaming until he turned and took her hand gently so she'd follow him.

He didn't want her to far away from him at any given time out here. Who knew what else was roaming the woods around them. He and Carol had just kissed. She'd kissed him. He'd kissed her. He squeezed her hand. "Want to kick off your shoes and wade in bit?"

She nodded, still unable to form a complete thought. What had just happened? What was going to happen? She didn't know, but she sure wasn't going to ruin this moment by opening her mouth and over-thinking anything.

Daryl walked the edge of the bank and looked for any sign they were not alone. When he was satisfied they were safe, he turned to her and nodded. "Go ahead." He gave her a nod and lowered his crossbow.

She sat on a large overturned tree and began to pull of her shoes and socks. She hadn't gone wading since she was a kid. She looked up. "What about you?" When he shrugged, she reached for his hand and pulled him down to sit beside her. "Get those boots off and roll up your pant legs. Come in with me. Relax a little."

He chewed at his lip. "Carol, don't you think we're too old to be playing in the creek?" When she gave him a nudge, he sighed softly. "A'right. But just for a minute. And I'm only getting my feet wet, you hear me?"

"Whatever you say, Daryl." She was already standing up and propped her foot on the log and set about rolling up her pant legs to her knees. She watched as he started to do the same. Her eyes cut over at him. A smirk played at her lips. "Just your feet," she echoed softly.

He wrinkled his nose at the sight of his own feet. They were ugly things. Like hobbit feet outta that dumb Lord of the Rings shit he'd watched on the TV one night. He snorted when he looked over and saw her feet. Her toe nails were painted hot pink. "Well, all be damned."

"What?" She looked up then as she planted both her feet on the forest floor and straightened up. "Do you see something." Then she saw him pointing at her toes. She wiggled them then and gave him a sad smile. "Sophia did them the night in the CDC. We found an old bottle of polish in my bag, and I let her...paint them." She looked down and stared at her feet. She pulled something out of her pocket then and held it tight in her fist. She held out her hand to him and opened her palm and on Carol's palm sat a bottle of hot pink nail polish.

Daryl looked up then and met her eyes as a single tear rolled down Carol's cheek. He reached up and wiped it away. He didn't say anything. It's why he kept Merle's bike and left his truck behind. He loved that fucking truck, but he loved Merle more. He understood, and she knew that. He whispered, "Keep it with you always..." He curled her hand back closed and held it gently and stepped forward. "Ready?"

When she felt his hand on her cheek, she closed her eyes. Then when he spoke, she nodded her head slowly. Always. And she would. No matter if it dried up, or she used it all. She knew she'd never part with that bottle. And she'd forever keep her toes pink. So long as she could find a bottle of it here and there for the rest of her life.

He gently prodded her toward the creek, but he stepped around her and waded in first. He sucked in a breath. "Jesus!" he gasped but kept moving out deeper. He looked at her. "Think you can handle it?" he teased.

She smirked. "Well, I know I can." She waded in splashing him up further on his legs and he winced everytime. "Wimp..." she teased. He splashed her legs and she shrieked and tried to get away from him. Before they both knew it, they were wet all over from splashing and playing around. She hadn't had this much fun in forever. And it was all because of him.

When he advanced on her, she faked dodging to the left but really moved to the right, and he stepped into the hole she'd been avoiding and ended up face first in the creek. He turned to look at her and knew she was trying so hard to keep from laughing as she put her hand to her mouth so he wouldn't see her grin. "Think that's funny, do ya?"

She shook her head. "No! No!" She put her hands up then as he stood up and advanced on her. "What's good for the gander is good for the goose..." He chased after her and she ran right out of the creek. He caught her about the waist. His cold body and clothes were pressed against her and she shivered. "Let me go. Just let me go..." she pleaded as he made her laugh. She tried to push him off her, but then she felt his lips against her neck right below her ear.

He loosened his grip but he kept kissing and slightly sucking at her soft skin. "Distract and destroy..." He scooped her up then and fireman carried her to the creek where they both went into the deep pool up to their necks. FUCK! it was cold, but he pulled her close.

"Payback's a bitch," she retorted softly as he held loosely. "And it comes when you least expect it. So just keep that in mind, Dixon."

"Don't plan on forgettin' it..." He met her eyes then and gave her a real smile then. One that if she told anyone, he'd deny. He released her.

They spent another hour or so swimming and just enjoying each other's company. He sighed softly as he looked up at the sky. "Looks like a little rain could be headin' our way. Might better head on back now..." He was already making his way to the bank of the creek and for his shoes.


	9. Chapter 9

Carol frowned. She'd been having fun out here, and for once since this awful mess started, she'd been able to forget everything bad. Almost. Sophia was never far from her thoughts ever. She looked up at the sky and sighed. "I guess so."

Daryl watched her and chewed at his lip for a second, then he smiled. "We can come out here again. I mean, if ya wanna..." He saw her lips go from frowning to a smile. He knew he'd offered the right thing. He moved to the log and started to put on his socks and shoes. He wrinkled his nose. It wasn't easy putting wet feet into dry socks.

She was just getting out when the first rain drops began to hit her. She looked up, feeling more hit her face. She hurried to Daryl and quickly put on her shoes. "I don't think we'll make it back before a downpour hits..."

He narrowed his eyes. "The trees will keep a lot of if off us, but we need to try to get as close to the farm as we can before the bottom falls out." He grabbed his crossbow and slung it over his shoulder. He reached for her bag and handed it to her. After she slipped it on, he grabbed her hand and tugged her along. "Just try'n keep up, a'right?"

They were almost to the field beside the farm when the torrential rain began to beat down on them. She could barely see for the water in her face. Her hand still held snug in his. She wasn't about to let go now. The lightning lit up the sky, and she visibly winced, getting even closer to him without any prodding on his part.

He stopped in the canopy of the trees right on the edge of the field. "We can make a run for it. My tent is the closest, but we're gonna be soaked to the skin." He noticed her teeth chattering already. He chewed at his lip. "On three we run, a'right? I got dry clothes there that'd be a'right for now." He studied her face. "One. Two. Three..."

They took off, still clutching each others hands as they ran. He wouldn't normally care about the weather, but he knew she was freezing. Not more than five minutes later they were at his tent and he was fumbling to get the zipper open.

Soon as the tent was opened, she was pushed gently inside. She turned to see him slipping in behind her and re-zipping the zipper to keep the rain from flooding the floor of his tent. She wrapped her arms around herself and looked around. She'd been there not too long ago, but that felt like an eternity. And again, she felt just as safe.

He began to rummage around in his meager pile of clothes for something she could put on to keep warm. He managed to pull out a shirt and pushed it into her hands. "That...that should cover you. And what it don't cover, you can get inside the sleeping bag." His cheeks were flushed red and warm and he avoided her eyes.

She managed to catch his hand and when she did so, his eyes snapped up to hers and she held them in a steady gaze. "We can just turn our backs and get changed and dry," she suggested to put him at ease.

He nodded slowly and rummaged for something for himself. He found a dirty pair of trousers and another shirt. "Okay. You let me know when you're done..." He didn't want to embarrass her or himself for that matter.

She nodded slowly and gave him a reassuring smile. She turned her back to him and quickly set to work changing her clothes. She kept sneaking little glances at him. It was hard not to do with how small his tent was. She could hear ever move he made. The last glance that showed his naked bum was the last one she took. Her cheeks flamed red then. She whispered, "I'm finished."

"I ain't. Don't turn 'round yet." He found it difficult to pull on dry underwear and a pair of trousers in the cramped space. He grunted and huffed, finally managing to get them on and fastened. "A'right."

She turned around and prayed that he wouldn't see how red her cheeks were. She swallowed trying to wet her throat. "Thanks..." she said and scooted into the sleeping bag, but she remained sitting up.

He cleared his throat and looked up at the sky. The rain wasn't letting up, and he knew how much she hated closed in spaces. "I got a deck a cards if you wanna play a game or something..."

Her eyes moved over to him. "Yeah. Keep my mind busy..." she nodded slowly and shifted so they were face to face. "So what we gonna play? Poker? Gin Rummy? Go Fish?" She rattled off the only three card games she knew anything about other than Solitaire.


	10. Chapter 10

Daryl's eyes moved up to her face. His eyes danced with mischief, but he hid that well. He narrowed his eyes and tilted his head slightly. "You play poker?" He found when he wasn't looking or even trying to that he was learning more and more about this woman that had taken it on herself to cement herself into his life.

"I know how. Being any good at it, that's whole other story entirely." She shuffled the card, meeting his eyes. "Not like we got any money..." And thanks to the rain, the only other thing they could use as a bet was soaking wet. All she was left with was her panties and Daryl's shirt.

"Always strip poker..." he suggested as their eyes met again. "Way I see it, we're pretty much even if we use what clothes we done took off before the ones we got left." He shrugged his shoulders non-committedly. "Whatcha got? Bra, two socks, and your jeans?" When she nodded, he continued, "And I got a shirt, pair of jeans, and two socks. Makes us damn near even, dontcha think?"

\--

Half an hour later, she used one hand to cover up her bare chest as she used the other hand to look through her cards. "You're a card shark, Daryl Dixon. I'm never playing with you again, you cheat!" She chewed at her lip and tried to hide the blush on her cheeks, grateful for the rain making it dark in the tent.

She laid down her hand with two jacks. She chewed at her cheek. "C'mon. You could let me win one hand. All you've had to give up is two socks you didn't even really have on."

Daryl let out a soft chuckle before laying down his hand of four kings. "I believe you only got one thing left to give me." He held out his hand as a devilish smirk split his face. "Hand 'em over, Carol."

Carol kept her hand over her small breasts, concealing them both easily. She met his eyes. "You're just lovin' this, aren't you?" She used her free hand to twirl her finger around in a circle. "You're gonna have to turn around."

He chuckled again, doing as she said. A few seconds later, he felt something touch his shoulder and he heard a shuffling noise behind him. He turned his head to the side, seeing the white cotton fabric laying on his shoulder. He turned slightly, seeing her eyes as she was barely peeking out over his sleeping bag. He turned fully then. "Hey..." he teased. "Where the hell is the fun in that? I didn't get to see nothing."

She pulled her hand out from under the sleeping bag and gave him the finger. "Neither did I. So there. We're even." When he started to laugh, she let one leg come out from under the sleeping bag and pushed at him with her foot.

He caught it easily enough. His calloused hands moved over her soft skin, licking his lips. He hadn't expected anything to come of this little bit of fun and distraction, but here she was naked and in his bed. He swallowed hard as his throat went dry. "Carol..." he breathed.

She slowly pushed the sleeping bag to the side, revealing her naked torso and nothing more. She gently removed her foot from his grasp and reached out her hand and sat up slightly to take his and pull him toward her.

When she didn't meet any hesitation, she sat up more until he was on his knees beside her, meeting her half way. Their lips met again and again. The kisses were chaste and hesitant at first. Her heart felt like it was thundering right against her eardrums.

He pulled back and looked at her, drinking in every inch of her within his sight. He whispered, "You sure 'bout this?" But his lips were already on hers again. His tongue pushed passed her lips, sucking at her bottom lip.

\--

They were a mass of tangled limbs and sweaty skin. Her head fell against his shoulder as her hand slipped to his hip. She gave it a gentle squeeze. "You regret it?"

Seconds ticked away into minutes. The silence killed her little by little. She started to turn into herself and away from him when he caught her, stilling her. His finger moved under her chin lifting it so their eyes could meet. "Do you?" When she shook her head, he lowered his lips to hers in a soft, gentle kiss. The kiss became more insistent until air became a need. "Not at all, Carol. Not at all."


	11. Chapter 11

The rain finally let up in time for Carol to start to head to the house to help with supper. She stood up in the middle of his tent. "Think they'd mind if I went into the house like this?" she teased, toeing his naked hip. "Or this?" She tied the shirt at her waist. It was still big on her, but it was better than her soaking wet shirt. It was bad enough that she was going to have to wear soaking wet blue jeans. She reached for her panties then, pulling them on.

She caught him watching her. It unnerved her a little that he said so much without opening his mouth. She swallowed hard, licking her lips. "You going to come up to the house with me?"

He shook his head as he pushed himself up to prop on his elbow. "Thought I'd go see 'bout the watch schedule tonight. I ain't got no place in that kitchen with a bunch a hens cluckin' 'round..." He gave her a wink. "Pretty sure they'll be nosing 'round 'bout our little trip into the woods. I ain't gotta be no part of that."

"It's none of their business what we do." She fell onto her knees beside him. Her hand moved to his shoulder as she searched his eyes. Her hand slipped from his shoulder up his neck and then caressed his cheek. Leaning forward, she caught his lips in a tender yet seductive kiss. "Can I come back later?"

"You even gotta ask that, lady?" His head fell forward, resting on hers. He opened his eyes, searching hers. When she shook her head, he gave her a half smile. "Then my door's always open." He cupped her neck with his free hand, kissing her again. Her lips were intoxicating and soft. He pulled back and gave her another half smile. "Best get on up to the house, Carol. 'fore they send out a search party looking for ya."

\--

Carol let the bustle in the kitchen fade around her as she continued on with the task at hand; peeling potatoes for their evening meal. She licked her lips and didn't realize that she had a smile plastered on her face until someone nudged her and then the whole room fell into a fit of laughter. "What?" she said as she snapped herself out of it.

"You tell us, honey. You've been a million miles away since Daryl walked you to the door. What gives?" Lori leaned on her elbows, chin in her palm on the counter as she waited for Carol's answer. She had a feeling she knew what had taken place either out in the woods or in that tent when the rain fell. She was wearing his shirt after all.

Carol felt her cheeks heat up as the blush crept up her cheeks. She looked down at her hands and the knife she held in one hand and the potato in the other. "Oh, Lori. Stop it..." she chided. "Just thinking, I suppose."

Beth sat at the table watching all of the older women with rapt attention. She turned her head slightly. "I don't get it..."

Maggie rolled her eyes. "Elizabeth Greene!" she scolded. "You know exactly what we're talkin' 'bout. You get the same look in your eyes whenever Jimmy walks into the room, and don't you go denying it either..."

Beth blushed then. She looked at Carol. "You and him? Really?" She'd been scared to death of him since he'd arrived on the farm. "Don't he scare you, ma'am?"

Carol let out a soft chuckle then, "Trust me, I've dealt with a lot worse than Daryl Dixon, and I'll tell all of you a little secret, but you gotta swear you won't let on..." She looked around the room, but she let her eyes rest on Beth. She watched as the young girl crossed over her heart and began to smile. "He's not half as tough as he looks. You just can't let him know you aren't afraid of him. Hurts his pride... He's no more harmful than a pussy cat."

Shane stepped into the kitchen. "Well, I know you ladies aren't talking 'bout me. I'm wild as a bear and just as cuddly..." He gave Andrea a wink then. "Just ask her..." He grabbed an apple off the counter.

Andrea rolled her eyes. "Cuddly isn't a word I'd use to label you, you big ass. Get out of here. "We're working on dinner." She took the apple from him and replaced it. "You eat those and there won't be dessert tonight. Patricia's making apple pie."

Shane's eyes lit up and his mouth watered. "Yes, ma'am." He put his hands up and started backing out of the kitchen. "just came in here to let you know that Daryl and me are going to help Hershel mend a fence down in the south pasture. Some the cows got out and Glenn and Jimmy are wrangling them up. Should see Glenn trying to play cowboy. Rather funny..." He gave them a wave and was gone.

All the women turned to look at Carol then, but it was Patricia that spoke up. "So...spill it, Carol. What is going on with you and the Dixon boy."

"A lady never kisses and tells..." She smirked and went right on back to peeling potatoes. That was how she left it. She had to give them something or they'd never leave her alone. She couldn't risk any of them bringing it up at dinner that night.

The kitchen went back to work as a whole. Each of them let her words tumble around in their head and drew their own conclusions. Some of them kept stealing glances at Carol as they worked, blushes creeping onto their cheeks as they let their imaginations run rampant.

\--

Shane let out a soft chuckle and clapped Daryl on the back. "Man, you best be glad I'm the one that went in there and not you. I think they'd have eaten you alive..." He let out a low whistle and a chuckle.

Daryl's eyes narrowed as he glanced up toward the house then back at Shane. "'Xactly why I told 'er I wasn't coming in there. Bunch a hens all cluckin' 'round peckin' for whatever x-rated morsel they can get greedy lil fingers on." He snorted low and shook his head. He could feel his stomach bubbling from fear mostly, but there was a bit of annoyance too. "Women."


	12. Chapter 12

It wasn't lost on Carol how Daryl just happened to volunteer for watch on top of the camper when dinner rolled around. It was always eat first then relieve whomever was on duty, but tonight, he changed things up. It gave her an unsettled feeling in the pit of her stomach, and she wasn't able to finish her meal. She tried to hide it with clearing the dishes for the Greene girls to wash. She then volunteered to take Daryl a plate of dinner. Adding what was left of her own meat to his plate, she carried it and a glass of water toward their camp and the RV.

 

Daryl kept his eyes on the farm and the surrounding land. Walkers could come up out of nowhere and be on them before they knew it so the person on watch had to be diligent. He heard the screen door slam and glanced at the white washed farmhouse and instantly knew it was her. Even at this distance, he could pick her out of everyone else. No doubt she was bringing him supper, and while he was grateful, he didn't know how to handle this new development between them.

 

Carol approached the ladder to the top of the RV and called up to him. "Little help here?" There was no way she was climbing it with a plate in one hand and a glass in the other. When she saw his head peek over the top, she reached the glass up to him.

 

He took the glass from her, offering to take the plate, but when she refused, he stood back to let her climb on top. He had wanted to avoid this conversation all together, but it looked like she had other plans. "You eat?"

 

She climbed the ladder with one hand and when she was safely on top, she handed the plate off to him. She nodded, glancing around the property. Two sets of eyes were better than one, right? She moved toward the end with the chair and crossed her arms over her chest as she pulled her cardigan tighter around her dwindling frame. "A little," she finally confessed. "Wasn't really all that hungry."

 

He rolled his eyes and let out a soft snort before moving to the chair and setting the plate in his lap and hungrily dug in. "You gotta stop with all that shit, Carol. Eat when it's in front of you. Never know when the meals are gonna stop."

 

She knew he was right. Closing her eyes for a moment to collect herself and her thoughts, she turned. "You okay with me being here?" Her eyes locked on him, trying to read his body language. It always screamed for people to not get to close, but tonight, it radiated off him in waves. "Because I can go..."

 

He kept quiet. This wasn't his strong suit. Women and talking and relationship stuff. He was better in the woods on his own with his crossbow. It was quiet, and he could think. And the last thing he wanted to do was hurt her, but this was just how things were with him. Right? Some men just didn't change. It had been good, better than good, when he was with her like that, and he'd never allowed anyone else get that close to him. He never would again, he wagered, but she was scaring the absolute hell out of him. He didn't know what to do so he just kept eating. He didn't look at her. He couldn't see the look in her eyes. This would be easier for both of them if it stopped before it even started. One of them would lose out in the end. One of them would end up dead, and it could break whichever one survived. And he wouldn't have that.

 

Her eyes filled with tears as the silence lingered between them. He hadn't told her to go, but he damn sure hadn't asked her to stay or reassured her that her presence was wanted or even tolerated. She watched him as he ate his food and tried to pretend she wasn't even there in the first place. "Fine," she breathed after several moments of uncomfortable silence. A tear fell down her cheek as she moved passed him to the ladder. "Sorry to have bothered you at all."

 

Her feet carried her down the ladder, almost tripping on the last wrung. She angrily wiped at her face as another tear fell down her cheek. She refused to give into her feelings. Instead, she let the sadness and hurt turn to anger. She felt the wall coming up, protecting her when nothing else could. She would prove to herself and to the others that she needed no one else to survive, no one else to care about. What did it get you in the end anyway? Sorrow. Pity. A broken heart?

 

He glanced over at her as she fled from the camper and straight to her tent. He knew he was being an ass, but it couldn't be helped. He had to do this for her own good. For his own, too. But why did it hurt so bad? It hurt worse than losing Merle. It ached worse than his regret at not bringing her daughter back to her safely. It just fucking hurt. He tossed his plate and fork to the roof of the RV and cursed, "Oh hell."

 

But he didn't go after her. He didn't chase her. Because then all this had been for nothing. And he was doing it for her own good. She deserved better. And they all knew it.


	13. Chapter 13

Carol laid awake that night, fully clothed and a bag packed beside her. She kept her hand on it, knowing it had to be done. If he wanted to pretend like she didn't exist and that what had happened that afternoon hadn't happened, then she'd just make it easier on him. She'd leave. She'd no longer be a burden to this group, and she'd either wind up walker food or she'd prove to herself once and for all that she could make something of herself. She knew the odds weren't in her favor, but she couldn't risk anyone else's life trying to save her own.

The change came around three every night. She sat up a little, ears straining to hear who had releived Daryl from his post. It sounded like Andrea, but she couldn't be sure. So she held her breath, counting to one thousand in her head to give Daryl enough time to get to his tent and settle down for the night, then she slowly moved, unzipping her tent. She pushed her bag out, hiding it on the opposite side of her tent from Andrea's line of sight. She pulled herself out of her tent as quietly as she could. And sure enough, Andrea was too focused on the opposite side looking out at the pasture that separated camp from the woods to notice that she'd even stepped foot outside her tent.

She grabbed her bag, slinging it over her shoulder and careful to not step on any leaves or twigs in the dying light of the fire. She made it to the edge of camp, thinking she was home free when his voice stopped her in her tracks.

"What do you think you're doin'?" Daryl knew she might try something as foolish and stubborn as this, and that's why he'd waited in the shadows. He'd waited to see if she was stupid enough to pull a stunt like this and try to get away with it.

Carol's heart hammered in her chest. She hadn't heard him or seen any sign of him until he'd spoken. Her hand moved to her throat, clutching it. She stamped her foot a bit and hissed out, "Daryl Dixon!" She let out a huff then, anger bubbling through her at the memory of how coldly he'd treated her just hours before. She pushed passed him, intent on carrying out her plan. "It's none of your business."

He snorted. "Like hell it ain't." He had to jog a few paces to catch up with her. "Carol, what do you think you're going to accomplish goin' out there alone with no one to watch your back? Think nobody in this group won't wake up in the mornin', find you gone, and just cut their losses?" When she wouldn't stop walking toward the old dirt road that lead toward town, he reached out, gripping her elbow and tugging her backwards and against him.

Damn it. She felt so good against him, and flashes from that afternoon played through his mind. Her hands were so gentle as they moved over his scarred skin. Her hands touched him with love, something he wasn't accustomed to, and something he'd never felt from anyone else. He closed his eyes then, swearing soft and low against her ear. "Shit, Carol. You think I wouldn't come and find you myself? After everything, you think I'd just let you go?"

He'd had plenty of time up on that RV roof to think, to suss out his priorities, and she was one of them. Had been since he took it upon himself to find that little girl. And here she was, pressed against him and all he had to do was wrap his arms around her and hold her tight. He turned her slowly, meeting her eyes in what was left of the moonlight that hadn't hid behind a cloud. He whispered, "You wanna leave me here with all these assholes when you're the only reason I'm stayin' in the first place?"

Carol's breath had caught in her throat when he'd grabbed her elbow and pulled her back to him. She'd been afraid to move or blink or let it out. She was afraid that he'd push her away again if she did, but instead she'd heard something in his voice that was akin to some of the greatest love stories she'd ever seen in the movies. She swallowed the lump in her throat when he turned her around. Their eyes had met and he'd spoke those words gruffly in a whisper. She felt her hand moving up, sliding along his chest. She had her hand over his heart now.

"Didn't think you'd care one way or another," she admitted softly. He was confusing her. First, he pushed her away, and now he was pulling her in again. She didn't know which end was up and to her that was more terrifying than anything else that she'd experienced in her life with the exception of her losing her daughter and seeing what had become of her.

"Didn't think I'd care?" He knew he deserved it, but to hear her say it cut much deeper than anything he'd done all night to beat himself up. He deserved for her to never look at him that way again, but he wanted it. He craved it. He moved his hand from her elbow to her hip. He massaged it gently, remembering the way it felt when it had been bare and beneath him. He closed his eyes and stepped forward, closing the distance between them.

Their mouths met in a chaste kiss. And it was followed with several more of the same kind. Until she moved her other hand up to the back of his neck and pulled him in for a deep kiss that left them both breathless only moments later.

She had her eyes closed now, breathing labored, and whispered, "So what exactly does this mean?" Her eyes slowly opened as she watched him.

"Depends. You gonna stay or go?" Daryl, reaching up and taking her chin with his two fingers, searched her eyes.


	14. Chapter 14

Carol's eyes searched his. "Depends. What happens if I stay?" She had to know that they'd make this work no matter how hard it seemed. That he'd stop pushing her away. Or at least make an attempt to try. She had to know it wasn't going to be like earlier that night where he was so cold and had barely even acknowledged her presence.

Daryl's fingers came up, taking the strap of her canvas bag and tugged it off her shoulder, slinging it onto his own. "Baby steps..." he breathed, hoping she'd understand what he meant by that. He couldn't just go from being completely alone to having her up his ass all the time. He needed his space and privacy, but he wanted to know that he got to come home to her. That she was his.

She chewed at the inside of her cheek and let out a sigh. "Guess if that's all I get, then I'll have to take it, huh?" She leaned in, moving up on her tip toes, and kissed his cheek softly. "Guess that means space and time to do your own thing?" When he gave her a slight nod, she smiled then. "I can do that. Be patient and give you space and all, just so long as you can be patient and know sometimes I need reassurance that we're okay."

"I can do that," he echoed her words back to her. His hand slipped gently into hers and started leading her back toward camp. And he heard her breathing slowly and steadily beside him and decided that had to be his most favorite sound.

She expected him to lead her right on back to her tent, so she was surprised when he kept them to the shadows and lead her right on to his camp that was a good way from the main camp. She didn't say a word, and she was fairly sure that she'd stopped breathing at some point because he stopped to unzip his tent and glanced back at her, she was surprised to hear him chuckle a bit.

"What?" His voice held a hint of amusement. "Think I'm going to bed alone after the fight we've had. Heard the best part about fightin' was the makin' up..." He released her hand long enough to sit his crossbow down and toss her bag into the tent. Taking it up again, he moved onto his knees and tugged her slowly behind him.

Her heart was pounding even louder now, certain that the whole Greene farm could hear it as loud as it was pounding. She didn't speak for fear that her voice would betray her anyway. She watched as he removed his boots and then started to work on the buttons of his shirt. She moved her hand slowly and placed it over his. "Let me?"

He slowly let his hands fall, watching her. His mouth twitched a little, taking her in. They could only see a foot or so in front of them and had to feel their way around and let their other senses take over. He trembled beneath her touch as she accidentally touched his skin with her fingertips as she worked loose button after button.

When she'd reached the last one, she moved her hands slowly up his chest, pushing the shirt off his shoulders, but before he could shrug it free, she gathered the material in her fingers and held it against his chest and keeping his arms in place. She kissed the long scar that ran a good length across it. She let her tongue flick out, tracing it gently before finding his nipple and teasing it softly with only the tip of her tongue before encircling it entirely.

He was about to lose it now. His skin tingled and pricked, and he'd never felt like this before. Not even earlier when they had become intimate for the first time. That had been different than this. That felt like more of a moment of opportunity than anything else. This was going to be different from start to finish. This was going to shake his soul. He whispered, "Show me how to love you, Carol. I wanna do this right..."

His words made her pause and look up. She slowly laid him back on the crumpled sleeping bag and pillow. "There's not a right or a wrong, Daryl. You just got to feel your way." She then pushed the shirt off of him completely. When his hands were free, she took one in hers and slowly slid it up and under her shirt, placing it over her breast. She wanted his hands on her bare skin, but she had to let him get them there. This had to be slow and real to him.

He was certain that his hand was shaking more than not, and he locked his eyes with hers as he began to move his fingers, teasing her erect nipple beneath the fabric of her bra. She let out a soft moan, and his lip quivered. He let his eyes fall to the shirt that kept him from seeing her, knowing that he'd seen her before, but this would feel like the first time.

He moved his hand and slowly removed her shirt with both of his. He let his fingers and palms slide over her creamy smooth skin and let out a whimper as he attempted to unhook her bra. He found himself getting frustrated when the hooks just wouldn't cooperate with one hand and she reached back, sitting up slightly and unhooked it. She let it fall between them and reached for his hand again.

Placing it over her bare breast, she slowly slid her hand down his arm, gripping his bicep as his fingers encircled her nipple. His fingers were calloused from loading and shooting the bow and all the other hard work he'd done in his life prior to the end of the world. It shot little shoots of electricity from her nipple to her gut. And it had been so long since a man made her feel desirable that she thought she might come apart then and there and they had yet to become one. "Feels right, don't it?" she breathed.


	15. Chapter 15

Daryl had to concentrate on her words then because all he could hear was the blood rushing in his ears and his pounding heart. He breathed out, "What?"

She couldn't stop the smile that formed on her lips. "Good answer..." she breathed back with the soft hint of a chuckle. She shifted, laying down with him. They were pressed chest to chest now, lips just inches apart. She could guide him through every minute of their love making, but she wanted him to do the same for her. "Now show me what you like, Daryl. Show me how to touch you like you liked to be touched..."

He shifted, instantly hyper aware that he was aroused just from the little they had already experienced, and he couldn't meet her eyes. "How...how do guys normally wanna be touched?" And then he felt her fingers on his jaw, guiding his face back so that their eyes met. She shook her head, and he let out a gruff sigh and finally gave her a hint of a smile. "Fair 'nough."

"Good answer," she teased him softly, peppering his jaw with tiny kisses that lead to his ear. She slowly pulled his earlobe into her mouth, sucking then nipping sensually as she moaned into his ear. "I want to please you, make you feel like the only man in the world..." She felt his grip on her lower back tighten, keeping her pinned against him. She thought that she could like this possessive nature this man had shown toward her. She'd just have to coax him into bringing that man front and center. "I'm your's," she breathed as her lips made a path from his ear along his jaw and down his neck and chest and even lower. Her tongue teased his belly button and she unbuttoned his jeans. She let her fingers gently tug the zipper down. "Am I getting warmer?"

Her breath was hot against his skin, and it was all he could do not to squirm or hurry her up, but he kept his cool. His hand moved down cupping her cheek and whispering, "You don't have to do that..." He knew from talking to several of Merle's conquests that it wasn't something that women enjoyed, but merely did it as a way to pleasure their man.

"Want to." She pushed his hand from her cheek gently. She slowly pulled him free and teased the head of him with only her tongue at first. Then she engulfed him, and she was certain that Daryl had passed out from the sheer pleasure of it, until she felt his hand on her shoulder, massaging where it lay. His grip and the pressure was completely bearable and wanted. It let her know that she was doing it right, that he was enjoying himself.

His other hand came up, rubbing his mouth and chin as his eyes rolled back. She kept that up, then it would be over before it even began, and he couldn't have that. No. Instead, he shifted, sitting up and pulling her up with him. His mouth pressed to hers, parting his lips and kissing her deeply. His tongue slid along hers and let out a moan.

He shifted, pushing her onto her back, awkwardly trying to maneuver out of his pants and underwear as he began to try and get her out of her remaining clothing as well. He hissed out, "Fuck..." When he heard her chuckle again, he found that it no longer made him feel self-conscious, but it was endearing and sweet. "What you laughin' at?" he teased. "Could help me out here."

She shook her head, lifting her hips when he'd finally managed to get her zipper down. "You're doing a good job all by yourself. Why stop now?" Her hands were in his hair, pulling his mouth back to hers. The tent was quickly heating up as their layers began to diminish and were now nonexistent. She hooked her leg around his upper thigh, pulling him down to press against her center.

She ached for him to be inside her. Now. And she whimpered when he seemed to have other plans. Her leg was pushed back to the sleeping bag and his mouth was hot on her skin as he traveled south, fully prepared to return the favor. She looked up into the heaven's. The whimper that left her throat was almost unrecognizable as his mouth pressed against her bare heat. She writhed beneath him, unable to escape the grasp he had on her hips as he held her down.

Just when she thought she couldn't take anymore of his teasing torture, he entered her with his fingers and she cried out again. She came hard, coating his fingers and lips. She felt the blush creep up onto her cheeks with how quickly she'd gotten there, but he didn't seem to mind. He continued to lavish her affectionately until she just couldn't stand it anymore.

"Daryl, now," she begged. "Please now. I need you. Want you..."

When he heard her words, he smiled against her. He didn't even bother to wipe his mouth clean of her before he moved back up her, kissing her mouth hard as he parted her legs a bit wider to accommodate him and entered her with a deep thrust. "Jesus Christ," he breathed as their lips parted.

The motion of their bodies joining and rejoining was all they could both concentrate on. Their hands were everywhere. Touching, caressing, encouraging. She came again, this time with him inside her and it was beyond anything she'd ever experienced with a partner before, and her nails scratched down his back, scoring his skin with angry red welts that were made from nothing put love and pleasure.

Their love making went on for what felt like hours, and when they fell down against the sleeping bag, sweat soaked and sated, the sun was coming up and the rooster crowed off in the distance. She snuggled in close to him and breathed, "Oh God..."

He chuckled then. "Not quite, but I'll take the compliment." That earned him a sweet love pat on the chest and a nudge in the ribs as they shifted and he was spooning her and had his mouth against her ear. "I got another condition to this...this whatever it is we're doin'."

Her eyes cut back, unable to see him from their position, so she turned her head slightly. "And what's that?"

"None of that hen talk where you kiss and, um, tell, a'right?" Daryl kissed her cheek.


	16. Chapter 16

Carol nudged him again with her elbow. "Done," she said with a smirk to her lips. She wiggled back against him until she was comfortable against him. Then he shifted causing her to frown and turn completely onto the opposite side and prop herself up on her elbow. "What else is buggin' ya, sweet cheeks?"

Daryl's cheeks flamed red and cut his eyes over to her, rolling them in the process. "Carol..." he warned. When her hand went up in surrender, he nudged her with his bare knee and let the conversation turn serious again. "I, uh, your girl...uh, Sophia..."

Her eyes clouded over, tears stinging her eyes. Her emotions were on overload from their encounter, and Sophia was always fresh on her mind. He had been a wonderful distraction, but it wasn't enough because when it was all over, there she was again. The grieving mother. She turned her head away, staring at the cieling as she laid on her back. 

They were touching, but it wasn't like before. She swallowed back the tears and whispered, "What about her, Daryl?" She wanted to close her heart off. No one should be able to know about her daughter but her. As much as she wanted to share with him, it all still felt to private.

He chewed at his cheek, thinking maybe he shouldn't have brought this up just yet, but it had to be said. She had to know. "I didn't mean...it. Ya know? What I said to you the other night 'bout her and you not bein' my concern." He moved his hand up to rub down his face, pushing his own feelings down deep to help her through this. He turned onto his side then, cradling her hip with his hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. "I'd like her to have been mine..." He shrugged.

And that's when the tears began to flow. She couldn't stop them even if she tried, and truth was, now that they'd started, she didn't want to. It didn't do her any good to hold her emotions inside and bury them. She turned into him, burying her face into his neck and held on tight. 

He wrapped his arms gently around her, taking care to keep her close as she wanted to be and laid back against the sleeping bag. He let his hand smooth up and down her back, trying to comfort her as much as that could. He simply didn't know what to say to her and he hoped this was enough. He knew she wouldn't complain, that she'd take what she could get and he loved that about her. His lips found the top of her head, kissing it gently.

They laid like this for what felt like hours and when she was all cried out, he lifted her chin gently and pressed his mouth to hers in a tender, lingering kiss. His eyes were parted only a little and he could see the tear stains on her cheeks. It broke his heart in a way that nothing else ever had. His thumb moved along her cheeks, wiping it away. 

"She'd have loved you, Daryl. That much I'm certain..." Her voice was soft, tear filled and way more raspy than it had ever been before when they'd spoke. It held a vulnerability to it that touched his very core. He held her just a little bit tighter. 

He had been about to speak again when the sound of approaching footsteps could be heard getting closer. He cleared his throat. "Who's stalkin' 'bout out there?" He shifted, letting her stay covered up by the sleeping bag and grabbed his jeans and started to yank them on.

Shane's voice was clear as the morning song birds just overhead. "'ey, Daryl. You happen to see Carol anytime since last night? Her tent's 'mpty and her shits gone." He rubbed the back of his head and glanced around at the makeshift camp the redneck had thrown together.

He poked his head out. "She's safe. Go on back an' tell the others so they stop frettin'. We'll be up at camp in a few minutes. Just woke up," he lied. His hair surely told another story. He felt his cheeks grow warm. 

Carol held her breath until she heard Shane's footsteps retreating and couldn't stop the laughter that rose up from her chest. She pulled the pillow to cover her mouth and hopefully muffle it so that Shane hadn't heard her, but she couldn't help herself. "Don't worry, Daryl. The hens will be talking and a chittering and I'll have kept my word." 

He narrowed his eyes at her and threw her jeans to her. "Get your pants on, Carol, and zip it." But there was a smile that tugged at the left corner of his mouth as he finished dressing himself and started in putting on his boots.


	17. Chapter 17

Carol hurried into her clothes, body somewhat stiff and protesting. She kept stealing shy glances over at him. “So what should we tell them?” She had her jeans and panties pulled up mid thigh, pulling on her socks and boots. She glanced around for her shirt

He shrugged a bit. “Ain’t none their business really, ya think?”He pulled his shirt on, threading the buttons as fast as he could. “The world ended but we still got to have our private time.” He leaned over then, kissing her still naked shoulder and gave her a half grin.

"Suppose you have a point." She reached up as his lips grazed her shoulder and touched his cheek lovingly. "I’ll head on down first?" She wasn’t sure how he wanted to play this. She managed to stand up awkwardly then, yanking her clothes up and fastening the button and zipper.

"Lookin’ for this?" He had her bra hooked on his finger, holding it up to her. His cheeks flushed red. When she took it, he pushed out of the tent and gave a good stretch and half moan. "Aint seein’ no reason we can’t do our walk of shame together."

She emerged from the tent then, only her bra covering her top half as she pulled on her shirt over hear head. “Daryl Dixon!” She swatted playfully at his arm and then shook her head. “Keep that up and next time, you gotta beg.”

He chuckled a bit and leaned in close to her ear. “I can hold out as long as you. Longer even. But where’s the fun in that?” He pulled her in close, pressing his mouth to hers in a soft, sweet, long kiss.

Her arms wrapped around his waist, holding onto him as she leaned into him slightly. He had her head swimming. “Yeah. True.” She grabbed up her bag, intent to return her things to her tent when he took it from her, tossing it back inside. She felt strangely giddy at the prospect of being invited, at least for now, to share his space.

He grabbed his crossbow, hitching it up on his shoulder and they headed out across the field to rejoin the others. She glanced over at him from time to time. “What’s your plans today?”

"Gotta talk to Rick or Glenn ‘bout a run into town. Need a few things. Probably set out after breakfast. Need somethin’?" He narrowed his eyes as he watched her. "Be takin’ one the horses if the ol’ man says its a’right."

She worried her cheek between her teeth and wrapped her arms around herself despite the heat of the day already. She didn’t like when he left the farm for any reason. And today, she got this feeling in the pit of her stomach that he should stick close to home, but she pushed it away. “No, I’m good. Thanks though…”

He could see the wheels turning even though she kept her mouth shut and didn’t voice her concerns. He touched her fingers gently. “Gonna be careful,” he reassured her.

She gave him a soft smile and a knowing nod. Even still, she couldn’t just swallow her feelings, but she kept silent about them. “You better get on back here in one piece or no dessert for you. And I have it on good authority that we’re having apple pie tonight.” Simply because she’d asked to make one and had been given permission to use the cellar and food there for whatever she needed.

He chuckled then. “Guess I better get on back in one piece and get that pie.” They were at the camp now and Rick was motioning him over. “See you, Carol.”

"See you," she repeated back to him before moving off to join Lori and Andrea.

\- -

Daryl gathered a small list from the others after collecting a horse from Hershel that he let the old man hand picked himself this time so that he wouldn’t meet the same fate as the last time. He patted the horse’s side, seeing her heading his way as he saddled him up. He’d gotten a lot of looks that morning, but he ignored it as he set about to do his own thing. He hadn’t planned to say goodbye as he had every intention of returning, but it made his stomach twist and knot to see her heading his way.

She rubbed the horse’s nose gently before placing a kiss there. She caught the bridle strap and held it’s head away from her so she could see him clearly.

His muscles rippled as he made short work of the task of tightening the girth underneath the horse. He set it where it was comfortable to the horse and secure. “Hey…” he replied gruffly. His hand rested on the top of the horse’s neck before stepping closer to her and giving her a shy smile. “Was just leavin’.”

She pressed a small strip of paper in his pocket. “Just somethin’ I thought we might need. Just a suggestion…” Her face burned bright red and even her ears were pink. She chewed at her cheek a bit and shrugged as she tilted her head.

He pulled the paper out of his pocket and let out a snort so loud the horse tossed it’s head and bumped her into him. He caught her easily, hands secure around her waist. He locked eyes with her. “Good thinkin’…” He tapped her temple and placed a kiss to her lips chastely. He righted her, making sure she was steady on her feet before pulling away and taking up the reins before shoving his boot into the stirrup. “Be back ‘fore you even have time to miss me.”

She watched as he slung his leg over the back of the powerful animal and clucked to it. She patted the horse’s neck again, then stepped back. “Not possible…” she called after him, but let him leave without another word.

\- -

It was nearing dusk. She paced the length of the porch, unable to sit still for any longer than a few minutes. She’d declined the offer to join them in the house for a bite to eat. She wasn’t eating until Daryl returned safely.

Rick stepped onto the porch. “Carol, it’s Daryl. He’ll be back. Probably waiting out some walkers and held up somewhere. He’s safe… Come on inside. Eat…” He tried the gentle approach first.

She shook her head. “I’m not hungry.” And the truth was, she wasn’t. He should have been back hours ago. There was no way a trip into town five miles from there should have taken damn near eight hours. She shook her head. “I want to be right here when he rides up…”

He let out a sigh and a knowing nod. “Alright. We’ll save you and Daryl a bite to eat. Plates will be in the oven, okay?” He touched her arm then, trying to draw her attention to him for a moment so he knew she heard him.

"Thanks." She gave him a quick look and then her eyes turned back to the road in which Daryl had disappeared down. She set up pacing again. She should have insisted that he stay home. Her gut had been right. And it was too late to send a rescue party to see what had held him up. They’d have to wait until morning.


	18. Chapter 18

Time seemed to almost stop as the sun sank lower and lower until darkness overcame the farm. She had sat down on the porch steps, trying desperately to hold onto the tiny shred of hope that twisted a knot into her very gut. She stared openly at the road, unable to take her eyes off of it for the longest time. Her ears pricked up at every minute sound as she waited. And waited.

Daryl couldn't be dead. He wasn't capable of dying. It went against his very nature. She took a shaky breath, burying her head in her hands and giving into the tears that had been too long held at bay. She wasn't ever going to forgive him for this. Her heart felt like it was being literally ripped into shreds with no hope at any sort of repair.

First, she'd lost her Sophia, and she was just barely hanging on from that. Maybe it hadn't been fair to Daryl to latch onto him so quickly after the fact, but she needed him. She loved him. He made her heart not so empty. Not so broken. And if she lost him, then she wouldn't know where to go or who to turn to. 

She didn't trust anyone else at camp. Not even Lori. She guessed that Ed had damaged her in ways she hadn't known until now. Her eyes were bright and filled with falling tears as she lifted her head to the heavens and whispered, "You done took my lil girl. My Sophia..." A whimper escaped her throat, constricting her voice and making it sound like it was being raked across gravel. "Don't take him from me, too."

\- -

She didn't know when she'd been coaxed inside, refusing to go passed the living room couch, insisting she had to wait for him, and had passed out into an exhausted sleep filled with horrible nightmares and happy memories intertwined. And now she was being shaken awake by a familiar hand upon her arm.

"Carol, sweetheart..." His voice gentle as he saw the tear stains on her face, no doubt they were for both he and Sophia. He knelt down, more gently as his hand moved from her shoulder to her cheek. He stroked her cheek then, not liking that everyone was openly staring as he tried to wake his sleeping lover. 

She reached out, hands around his neck. He stood then, lifting her to her feet as he held her close to him. Her eyes filling once again with terror and unshed tears. She hugged him hard, not wanting to let go, but pushing back and shaking him hard. "Don't you ever do that again, you hear me?" She pulled him in again, afraid to take her hands off him in fear this was just a dream. 

He wrapped one arm around her awkwardly, taking in everything she'd just said to him and managed to find the courage to wrap his other arm around her and slid up her back to cradle her neck. "Yes, ma'am..." He whispered into her hair. "Sorry I scared you. Got held up...had to wait til they cleared out." 

He glanced at Hershel. "Sorry 'bout that horse. Weren't no way I could save it. Shot it with my pistol. He didn't suffer..."

The old man put up his hand. "You returned with your life. That's all that matters." He hugged Beth into his side, knowing full well how much the horse meant to her. He'd been Shawn's. "Shh, Bethy. They're together now. Almost seems fitting."

Daryl's eyes closed then, unable to handle the look in Beth's eyes. He was through taking their horses for any reason. He moved his hand back up, taking her shoulders and pushing her back. "They told me you didn't eat..." It wasn't accusatory, just concern. "You hungry? I'm starved."

\- -

Several hours later, he had all the things in the bags distributed, including the condoms to his tent and a box to Maggie and Glenn as well. He snorted softly as the Korean gave him a goofy grin and a quick thanks and was off like a rocket.

He shook his head and turned to Carol as she approached him. He could see the hesitation in her eyes and finally rolled his eyes a bit. "C'mon. Out with it. Aint got all day." Yet, he surprised himself by not being near as harsh about it as it sounded in his head. 

She narrowed her eyes and then just blurted it out, "What was so important you went to town in the first place?" She didn't see any new bolts, no ammunition, no food or supplies. "So what gives?"

He fidgeted from one foot to the other, crinkling his brow and putting his thumb to his teeth to chew at it in his adorable but gross habit. "Well, can't that wait?" He didn't want the others to see or even know about it. He wanted it to be private and special.

She shook her head. "You worried me sick, Daryl. I deserve...I need to know what was so important." She stood her ground, stone faced and shaken.

Daryl let out a soft hiss of breath and stepped forward, but not before grabbing his bow and throwing it onto his back. He pulled something from his pocket and pushed it discretely into her hand. "This." And he didn't stick around to wait for her to unfurl her fingers.

Carol held out her hand, looking down at it almost afraid to open it. She knew what it felt like, and she was afraid to know he'd risked his life for that. She loved and hated him all in one moment.

She unfurled her fingers, and she found sitting on her palm a brand new bottle of hot pink nail polish.


	19. Chapter 19

Carol's legs barely held her up. The weight of that little bottle was heavier than anything else she'd ever owned. The bottle that Sophia had found was mostly thick and junky now, but she'd never imagined, he'd taken so much of it to heart that he'd risk his neck for her. And for something small and meaningless to everyone else but her and himself? She fought tears as she finally instructed her feet to carry her. 

She managed to catch up to him just as he slipped passed the tree line. She hadn't wanted to risk drawing attention to either of them by calling out. She crashed through the brush, and stopped abruptly.

Daryl had the crossbow lifted, aimed right at her. He held his breath. The anger and hurt in his eyes clear and present. He slid his finger away from the trigger but didn't lower the crossbow. "What do you want, lady? I'm busy in case you ain't noticed."

She stepped forward then, pushing the crossbow down and out of her face. She stepped closer, hand reaching out to cup his neck and her other, still holding the nail polish, connected with his hip. She stepped into him, ignoring the dirt and sweat and smell, and held him as tightly as his stiff body allowed. "I'm so, so sorry." 

He managed to wrap her in the tightest one armed hug. He buried his face in her neck and just breathed her in. Too many emotions were flitting through him. His crossbow fell into the leaves and dirt and his other arm crushed her even tighter to him. He moved his mouth against her neck, kissing and licking and nipping. "All I wanted was to make you happy. I wanted you to have that...so she went with you everywhere. It was...stupid." His mouth had moved along her jaw at this point, more kissing and sucking than nipping. 

He moaned as their mouths met. Words weren't needed. Not then. He turned her slowly, pressing her against a large oak tree and ran his hands down her side, cupping her ass. His mouth only left hers to allow them quick gulps of breath before they reconnected.

Her hands roamed his body, clawing and caressing his skin. She gripped the back of his shirt when he lifted her off her feet. Wrapping her legs around his hips, she let herself get completely lost in him. 

The bottle of nail polish dropped to the forest floor. Forgotten.

\- -

He tugged up his pants, buttoning them and then worked the zipper before buckling his belt. He kept his eyes downcast, almost ashamed that he'd been so aggressive with her. He'd made her cry out several time, muffling the sounds with his dirty palm. 

Carol's legs still trembled as she managed to get her free leg back into her pants and pull them up into place. He'd caused a reaction in her then that no one had before. She felt the tears falling down her cheeks and tried to hide her face.

He saw them anyway. He instantly stepped to her, cupping her cheeks and forcing her eyes to look deep into hers. "Christ, Carol...did I hurt you?" And when she shook her head no, he frowned. "Then why are you crying?" 

She closed her eyes then, taking a shaky breath. She opened her mouth, intent on speaking, but nothing came out. She closed it quickly and leaned heavily into him. "Felt so good." She didn't know how to act with him. 

Ed had never cared if she got pleasure from sex. He certainly wouldn't have been so concerned or tender had she cried afterwards. So this was new territory. So new it frightened her. 

"I can't believe you did that for me..." Then her eyes flew open as she remembered the polish. She pulled away. "Oh, Daryl. I dropped it!" She fell to her knees, frantically starting to search for the bottle. 

The noise they'd made had attracted a few unwanted guests, and he had to pull her up forcefully by the arm. "C'mon, Carol. Leave it. I can get you more. Promise..." His crossbow was up now, letting loose a bolt into the head of the nearest walker. He shoved her in behind him. "Go on. Get your ass back to camp."

She gripped his shirt hard. "I'm not leaving you." There was at least three more, maybe four, and they weren't stopping. She watched as he readied another bolt and let it fly. She pulled the knife from his belt, stepping around him and thrusting it forward. She managed to stab its cheek, but it fell backwards, taking her with it.

She heard him scream her name, but she had pulled the knife from its cheek, nearly vomiting at the squelched sound it made as he pulled from the rotted flesh only to jam in into the eye socket. She scrambled up, holding the knife so hard her knuckles where white as bone. 

He managed to take down the fourth walker and was now frantically searching for anymore. "Carol? Damn it! What was you thinkin'? I told you to run." But he wasn't near as angry as he let on. They'd just saved one another's lives. And he knew it. 

In the scuffle, they'd unearthed the nail polish. He bent and snatched up. He pushed it into her palm before he pulled her so tight to him and breathed, "You better not ever do that 'gain, hear me?" And suddenly he understood the fear he'd put her through by staying out all night.

And he knew things were definitely going to change. One way or another.


	20. Chapter 20

Carol's legs were still trembling. Only now she had no idea if it was from the sex or from their very lives being put on the line. She slowly lifted her head, meeting his eyes. "You know I can't promise you that. Not now, not anymore..." She shook her head. She refused to be that weak little mouse that cowered in the corners and waited for everyone else to save her skin. It had taken the world going straight to hell and losing the most precious gift she'd ever been given to wake her up to what it took to survive. She wasn't ever going to be that person again.

His eyes narrowed, intent on arguing with her. Intent on showing her that he could protect her, but then he knew the truth. No one was promised their next moment. And she had to do what it took in order to survive. And if that meant saving his ass once in awhile, then so be it. He wasn't going to get hung up on specifics.

They were alive. Nothing else mattered.

He gave her a nod, promising her that he understood. He lifted his hand to her cheek, stroking it gently before leaning in to kiss her lips. "Best get on back to camp. They'll all need to know there was a few of them out here. Ain't seen that many this close to the farm. Best be prepared in case we get a few more stragglers."

She pulled away slowly, tucking the bottle of nail polish into her pants pocket and patting it to know it was there against her hip. She took a shaky breath and started to pick her way around the bodies of the walkers and back toward the farm. It didn't take but a few minute to clear the trees. She glanced back, catching him as he watched her. She smirked a bit before returning her attention back to the path ahead of her.

It wasn't but a few seconds when he caught up to her. They were side by side, taking each stride together in tandem. He cleared his throat as he shrugged his shoulder a bit. "If you're serious 'bout protectin' yourself, I'd be glad to teach you some things. I mean, you did a'right back there, but you could stand to improve so that doesn't happen when you're alone. Falling over, I mean..."

She nodded quickly at the mention of teaching her survival skills. "I'd be happy to learn. I'm the first to admit that I know next to nothing on how to make it out here. If I ever got separated from you and the others..." she let her voice trail off, not wanting to think of the possibilities that could happen, but even less wanting to voice them out loud and make them real.

"Well, we'll just have to make sure that ain't an option... But in the meantime, you'll be best prepared if you got weapons with you at all times. Even takin' a piss. Never know when one o' them geeks are gonna turn up." He chewed at his thumbnail, spitting a piece off to his right. "That knife of mine is okay for me, but I think you need something a bit smaller. Easier for you to hold. Pretty sure we can find somethin'"

She listened to him intently. "I guess I need to go with the others when they learn to shoot, too, huh?" When he nodded, she gave him a soft smile and then nudged him with her elbow. "Or you could give me a few private lessons with that crossbow of yours," she half teased, but she was half serious, too. "Not that I could even draw that string back, but hey! Couldn't hurt to learn, right?"

"Right." He stopped in his tracks. "First lesson might as well take place now." He grabbed her by the elbow gently, pulling her to stand right in front of him and placing it in front of her. "See that pile of cow shit?"

She'd been caught off guard when he'd wanted to start immediately, but as his chest pressed against her back, she relaxed. "Yeah. You want me to aim out cow patties?" She turned her head, looking at him in confusion.

"No. No, I ain't wantin' to clean that off my bolts. Hit that, and you'll get a lesson in keepin' a crossbow and bolts in fine working order. But see that hollowed out log just to the left of it?" When she nodded, he turned his mouth close to her ear. "That's what you gonna aim for. Think you can hit it?"

"Sure." She spoke with more confidence than she really had, but there was no need in letting him know it. She let him place her hands exactly where they needed to be on the crossbow, and when he lowered his hands, she took in the weight of it. Her aim shifted a bit as she struggled to raise it up and look down the sight like he was explaining.

"And when you're ready, pull that trigger and let 'er fly." Daryl had his hand on her hip, remaining close to her in case she needed his help for any reason. He held his own breath as she steadied her hands and squinted one eye closed and then he saw her close the eye which she was aiming with and the bolt landed square in the center of the cow patty. He couldn't help but chuckle. "I weren't joking, Carol. You're gonna clean that shit off, not me."

She screwed up her face, biting her tongue and lowered the crossbow. "Damn it."

"Helps if you keep your eye open," he teased softly as he took the crossbow back from her and went to retrieve the bolt. "It's a fresh one, too..." He wrinkled his nose.

"Daryl," she planted her hands on her hips.

He glanced back at her, pulling it free and showing it to her. "Nice and fresh and green..."

She shook her head, smiling at him. "I guess I got a lot more learning to do." When he nodded, she stepped toward him and took the bolt and held it out away from her side, not wanting to get any of the cow poop on her clothes or skin. "Whatever it takes to survive, right? A little shit never hurt anybody." She would go out into the world fighting. And with him by her side.

"Whatever it takes," he promised her.


End file.
